4 Ways To Stay Sane As A Caregiver

We have all been there, pushed to the edge of no return. As soon as you gather your emotions the tears start streaming down your face. “That’s it!”

“I can’t take it anymore!”

Let me help you gather your composure…breath…You got This!

When I get to the point where no one understands what I go through as a caregiver, I take on the C.A.R.E. approach to guide me back to reality, regain strength, and love me again.

C.A.R.E.

• Commit to the task at hand and the reason why you took on the responsibility as a caregiver in the first place. We all have various reasons. For me, I was asked; at the time I couldn’t say, “No.”

I get you had to sacrifice and still sacrificing, not only that, you may be having doubts right now. I get it, it’s a lot easier said than done especially when you are at it alone. Stay focused, stay committed, and block out the negative thoughts running through your mind right now; I know you have them, remember, I’m a caregiver too!

• Actions speak louder than words…do more speak less. If the stress is more than you can handle, remove yourself from the situation and find something to occupy your mind.

• Resist the urge to voice your opinion in a harsh manner. It is far better to keep quiet than to lash out…saying words you will regret later. No matter how bad it gets, remove yourself from the situation…go outside and scream…wash the dishes…rearrange furniture…You get the picture.

• Elevate your purpose by giving yourself permission to let go and let God. Breath….journal, call a friend…just ask!

CARE also means to take care of yourself…love yourself…let go!

What is your acronym for C.A.R.E.? Say it, Apply it, Go for it!

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What Is Your Why

I finally did it! For years I have been traveling through my mind the idea of becoming a life coach for the purpose of building confidence in others…empowering others to live the life that has been placed on the back burner due to transition or lack of confidence. Transitioning into a new career…suddenly becoming a caregiver…unemployed…whatever life has dealt you, you had to take it on full force.

Well folks, I am now a Certified Life Coach and my goal is to help others accomplish their goals. Every one deserves a life of fulfillment, happiness, worth, and the confidence to turn that “I can’t” into “all things are possible with a little help.” Let’s face it, we all need help to reach our destination. It starts with:

1. Pushing the Go button by giving yourself permission to make a change pleasing to you.

2. Believing in yourself and the godly gifts you are blessed with.

3. Getting rid of “all” things negative.

4. Surrounding yourself with like minded people who hold you accountable.

My why is helping those that are always helping and doing for others. It’s your turn now!

Put yourself second. GOD first. Everything else will fall into place.

You are destined to be more than just a dream.

3 Things You Can’t Make Me Feel

​1. Guilty 

2. Insignificant

3.  Unloved

I will not do those things that are not pleasing to God to make you happy . On occasion I will slip up; afterall, I am human. You cannot force me to do that which makes me feel uncomfortable.

I am important. I do not have to prove anything to you. So stop trying to down me. If you persist….shame on you.

I’m loved by my Father. Enough said.

GUESS WHAT:

You don’t need anyone’s approval. Do you…be you…Know who you are…know WHOSE  you are!

3 Things to Refuse in Life

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There was a time in life (younger years) that it mattered what people said about me….how they perceived me…ignored me….did to me.

But now, I truly don’t care. 

 What I can’t do is:
1. Make you happy
2.  Make you like or love me
3.  Make you notice me
4.  Make you include me
5.  Make you speak to me

I refuse to:

1.  Gossip with you
2.  Lie with you
3.  Let you control me

What I can do:
1.  Love me
2. Pray for you
3. Live life on purpose

Folk  that constantly look for flaws in others refuse to recognize their own. Misery loves company. If they are not happy, you shouldn’t be happy. I’m here to tell you…Satan is a liar.

Refuse to let anyone steal your joy!

5 Ways to Ensure Your Sanity As a Caregiver

1. Know Your Purpose
Caregiving isn’t for the faint at heart. This is a path that takes a lot of discipline, patience, forgiveness, and lots of love.

2. Know Your Parent
Some parents are easy going and some are very difficult to understand. Heads will clash, feelings will get hurt, and regret may start to creep in your heart. Remember, they were used to depending on themselves and all of a sudden they have to depend on someone else, things can get a little confusing until you reach a common ground ensuring you have their best interest. Take a breather, try and understand why they act and feel the way they do. Talk it out.

3. Brace Yourself for Gossip
Trust me, if you are NOT doing something right; even if you are, you will be talked about. You try your best and the next thing you know, one of your siblings is telling you what mom or dad said behind your back. Now, parents can seem convincing! Give your family heads up. Let them know  what’s going on.

4. Emotional Ups and Downs
Caregivers need care too! You are going to feel alone, overwhelmed, overworked, and tired. You will cry when by yourself, pray, scream, whatever you do to relieve stress. Don’t let care giving get the best of you. It all goes back to #1, Know Your Purpose. Pray and ask God for strength. Be grateful to have a parent to take care of, think positive thoughts. I know what you are going through. As a caregiver myself, I understand that depression can set in, lack of taking care of yourself, and illnesses can rob you of things once hoped for. I’m here to tell you, rough it out. In the end it will be well worth it. You will be rewarded!

5. Take Time for Yourself
This is not an easy task. If you have family, hold a meeting to discuss a schedule on giving you a much desired break. If you don’t have family, see if there is a senior daycare in your area or recruit a friend you know you can trust; someone that understands your parents ways and emotional ups and downs.

When I look back at the career I gave up, I wonder if being a caregiver is worth it. I want to give up at times, but my heart tells me to keep on keeping on. I’ve been lied on on, talked about, feelings hurt, and so on and so forth. 
To be honest with you, when I started caring for my mom, a couple of my siblings called me around midnight to tell me I was weak and timid. Ouch!

But you know what, I have an outlet. Every 6 months to a year, I enroll in online classes to enhance and grow my knowledge in social media marketing, and elderly care. I have certifications in both social media marketing as as a professional and geriatric care. Not only that, my husband and I have date nights. In order to keep my sanity, I have to get out and let my hair down.

How do you keep your sanity?
What’s your outlet?
Talk to me.